I wasn't ready...

I wasn't ready..

As cliché as the saying goes. "A relationship is either a lesson or a blessing", for me it was both.

After few months of tossing around the stages of losing someone, I finally come to the point of acceptance.

This is my acceptance that I wasn't ready...

I wasn't ready for the blessing that was given to me.
Financially. Emotionally. Spiritually. Intellectually.

I placed  pressure on someone of a responsibility that I, myself, wasn't prepared for.
It was selfish for me to think only of how I feel.
It was selfish for me to allow myself to think only of the frustrations not the effort that was shown.

This is my acceptance of the unfair actions from my side. I should have chosen "us" than the noise that seems louder because of distance. I should have held tighter to the Author of love than the ideas of love.

This is my acceptance of the things that happened and of the things that I hoped to come to fruition but did not.

This is my subtle resignation to our downfall. That no amount of analogy will make me understand how can a single offense has the power to become the breaking point.

This is me making peace with myself. Grateful that for a moment I was loved by the man that I admire. That if I will be given the chance, I will still choose to mature with him, grow with him and grow old with him.

For now I must grow as an individual. I need to heal on my own. To go back to my first love and tap on His infinite grace.

Together or not. I believe His grace is sufficient enough to bring us where we should be.

For His ways are higher than our ways and His thoughts are higher that our thoughts.

Batad, Banaue - Atok, Benguet Itinerary

Here's a quick background story of our DIY tour to Mountain Province. Just recently, a news broke out about Sarah G's breaking down during concert due to 'emptiness'. Siguro uso yun ngayon. Yung feeling na wala kang feelings... hahaha! One of us felt that way kaya biglang chat "Tara Atok tayo sa weekend." As a support "Tara lumanghap tayo ng hangin na nakakagaling!".






We started booking our bus ticket to Banaue through CODA LINES. Then we booked transient house in Atok, NORTHERN BLOSSOM FLOWER FARM then another transient house in Batad, BATAD TOPVIEW POINT HOMESTAY.

Bilang DIY to, those three bookings already made this travel all set, bahala na si Batman sa mga magaganap pag dating doon.. :)


DAY 0:
--Friday 11:50PM--

Meet up at HM Transport Cubao Bus Station. Delayed yung flight namin, este travel. The bus arrived 1:00AM, sana naligo pa ko..nyahaha!


DAY 1:
--Saturday 8:00AM--

We arrived Banaue by 8:00AM. We registered at the Municipal then we meet Ate Grace, owner ng Batad Topview Point Homestay, sinundo kami to take another 1 hour van travel to Batad. Upon arriving Batad, we had to take another 8 minutes walk/trail to homestay.

To our surpise, heres' the view in front of us, nakaka-wow sya! Ang sarap gumising dito! ..parang pag gising sa tabi ng taong mahal mo..hihi! <3

After taking brunch, coffee and an hour of rest, we started getting ready for our Rice Terraces and Tippaya Falls Tour. Brace yourselves, it is a two hours of trekking along rice paddles and a lot of stairs! Syempre, your time depends kung gaano kayo katagal mag picture..hehe. It took us five hours back and forth including swimming.

Habang nag lalakad kami, wala kaming ginawa kundi hanapin si Thanos. Most of the travelers are foreigners than locals, so hindi si Thanos ang nakita namin, mga kasing gwapo lang ni Captain America. Nyahaha!

On our way, napapansin namin na lahat pababa, "Patay tayo nito pabalik, puro assault to!" at hindi kami nagkamali. HAHAHA! Do not worry, sulit naman! The falls was awesome, nag swimming kami kahit malamig. Nakakawala ng pagod. :)

KITA KITA (I See You) Movie

Sampung bilang ng katotohanan na nakita sa pelikulang KITA KITA.

ISA.  Isa sa libong tao na makakasama natin ang magpapakita at mag paparamdam kung paano tayo dapat mahalin. Tiwala lang, bes.

DALAWA. Dalawang mata na minsan hindi nakakakita kahit may mali na. Bulag, di nakakakita, di nakakapansin, dahil sa iba nakatitig. Madalas makakakita lang kapag ang pag-ibig ay nawala na.

TATLO. Tatlo, Apat, Limang taon, wala talaga sa tagal ng isang relasyon, kapag hindi pa sya ready, hindi pa sya ready. Kapag hindi ka na mahal, hindi ka na mahal. Madalas lang talaga na may mga duwag na lolokohin ka pa, hindi na lang makipag hiwalay agad. Pisti. Be a Tonyo in this world full of Nobu. Pwede ba!

APAT. Apat na salitang di ko makakalimutan "Only time can tell." Tagos eh!

LIMA. Limang uri ng pagmamahal.
Pagmamahal na bulag (one unique character lang na nagustuhan mo, kahit ano pa sya tanggap mo na)
Pagmamahal na paasa (naniwala ka na sa sinabi nya, kalokohan lang pala.)
Pagmamahal na traydor (pinagpalit ka sa mukang pusa.)
Pagmamahal na bitin (ganun talaga, minsan hindi happy ending.)
Pagmamahal na wagas (oo meron nyan, magtagal man o hindi, ramdam mo na totoo yun, greatest love kumbaga.)

Excuses on Starting Stock Market Trading

This is going to be my first entry about stock market trading. I started active trading August of 2015. I am but a newbie.

Kahit na marami na kong alam about Stocks, Mutual Fund, Variable Life Insurance,  UTIF, etc. It still took me some time before I was able to actively trade my COL account. Knowledge without application is nonsense, right? Parang yung friend mo na makapag advice about love, pero NBSB naman..hehe! You need actual exposure to actually know what is out there.

Below were my reasons behind my contemplation, may be you can also relate to these:


1. Akala ko para lang to sa mga matatalino at technical. Nakaka-overwhelm yung numbers and charts, saw the picture? paano basahin yang mga waveform and bars? Numbers! ang daming numbers!haha!


2. Para lang sa may mga pera at sobrang yaman. But I was wrong, having 5,000 na usually eh kaya mo ipang-lakwatsa, you can already have COL account and start from there. Here is the link on how to open an account https://www.colfinancial.com/ape/Final2/home/open_an_account.asp


3. Wala akong pera. Wala akong pang capital because I made wrong financial decisions in the prior year. I traveled a lot that compromised my finances. But, hey, kung gaano mo kagusto ang isang bagay, ganun mo din sya ka hard ka-career-rin. Bangon kaibigan! Cut other expenses to start investing.

A Wounded Disciple

A contradictory feelings, ranging from liberty to shame. That’s how you’ll feel realizing that your past wounds still have its impact in your today’s actions and choices.


To begin this article....

Once, there was this man who tried to love as Christ wants us to love. He made me understand these things by heart.




Your Experience Is Not Your Identity


If you experienced attraction to this and to that, or the other thing, you did this and did that, maybe you have been abused, hurt, or ignored, or maybe committed this sin and that sin, all of that experiences that left you wounded, keep in mind, that's your experience, not your identity.

You are not the sum of your weakness, your wounds, your failures or your sins. You are the sum of the Father's love for you and your capacity to be image of Jesus Christ to the world. - Pope John Paul II.

28 lessons learned at 28

I will say that as we get older, we get wiser. We experience new things both good and bad. We make mistakes, we learn, we grow. Through all my experiences, I’ve changed. I evolved like a pokemon as my friends used to say. Nyahaha!

Here’s the 28 things I’ve learned in my 28 years so far:

1. Stop too much selfies and emo post.
Yeah right. I’m guilty of it. Been there, done that. Not everyone has to know what you are going through.


2. Attitude has to change.
Diversify, do not stay with the same group forever, meeting new people means new perspective; means wider horizon; means better attitude.


3. Handling finances.
I have learned not to incur credit card debt, religiously save, and have personal insurance policies and stock positions. I will not be able to do it if I am not able to learn the next point which is..

"Princess of God" : Not Simple As It Is

"We are God's princesses; men should treat us with love and respect. We should not lower our standard for them. The right man will come for us."

A statement I heard from a woman.

I think some ladies are getting it wrong. I once was and am still learning from it.

Here are my initial reaction whenever I hear those:
1. Are we actually behaving like a princess?
2. Are we the right person for the right person that we are praying for?





Those phrases were true. I have nothing against it, but we have to put it in the right perspective.

Being a princess of God comes with so much more. Princess like thinking without backing it up with character is an issue that we have to deal with.

Yes, we are the Father's princess but we must think, behave and develop a character like one.

Physically.

It must be seen on how you dress. Ladies should always dress well and decent. You can be sexy without being revealing. To be seen as someone simple yet beautiful is far better than sexy. Respect is something we gain not something we impose. That is equally true if we want men to respect us. Learn to dress properly!


Mind and Soul.

It must be our goal to be a beautiful woman with beautiful heart.

We need to have an open mind and a teachable heart for this matter. We should learn and value the wisdom that our parents and elders are providing us. We will learn a lot from them.

Read your bible, God's wisdom is superb!
You can also read books, listen to podcast and other stuff to widen your horizon. Never stop learning! Be a woman of substance!