ACCEPTING SOMEONE'S PAST

In my early 20’s, as conventional as it may sound, I wanted my partner to have never had a girlfriend before. I wanted to be his first and last. And whomever I choose to be my boyfriend, I wanted him to be my husband.

The Reason Behind.

As much as possible, I don't want a partner who invested so much emotion with someone else.
I don't like the thought of him already had both emotional and physical intimacy. I believe that those things should be reserve for marriage.


So I have lived that standard and had a boyfriend who never really had a girlfriend before. Despite of that fact, things did not work well for us. He loved a woman before me and he still loves her while being in relationship with me. Epic failed.


The Lord is Sovereign.

The Lord changed me after that season of my life. He opened my eyes to the truth that sometimes things will not work out the way we wanted it to be. Sometimes because of our stubbornness or may be that needs to happen for us to grow. He is sovereign.

STOP RUSHING LOVE: FIND SOMEONE WHO SEES YOU

Way back in 90's, we have to wait for days or weeks before receiving a letter from our loved ones. I can still remember, we even have to record voice tape messages to be sent to my Auntie in Japan and Saudi Arabia. It take so much time and effort that we really have to mean what we say in every paragraph.

While in this internet generation, everything became instant, from noodles to relationships.
People can send message real time and get to know a person much quicker because we can talk to them anytime of the day. So, it seems that the relationship will progress faster. But the frequency of us talking to each other does not change our emotional capacity to develop first so it can grow.




Older generations get to know each other first, specially us Filipinos. Our way of courtship is so beautiful. From visiting the lady in her place. Picking her up during dates and bringing her home safely on time. Paying the bills and going extra mile to win her heart. Getting to know her together with her family and friends. A process that builds fire and stoking it to last. Our generation now seems to create a fireworks display; spectacular and beautiful at first but ends quickly as it began.

Do not awaken love until it so desires. - Song of songs 2:7

We are not allowing ourselves to create foundation. We are influenced by the "instant-gratification" mindset of our society. We change our status from 'single' into 'in a relationship' back to 'single' again. Leaving us frustrated and empty. Sadly, some of this relationships could have worked if only we give it time to develop, instead of putting so much pressure to bond too soon.

He has made everything beautiful in its time. - Ecclesiastes 3:11

LOVE AND OBSESSION

Differentiate Love from Obsession..

Love - It can refer to an emotion of a strong attraction and personal attachment. It can also be a virtue representing human kindness, compassion, and affection—"the unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another".


Obsession -It is a hypothetical state in which one person feels an overwhelming obsessive desire to possess another person toward whom they feel a strong attraction, with an inability to accept failure or rejection.


A certain friend once told me, "You should know the difference of love from obsession." Something that doesn't make sense to me; I do not know what she is trying to say -- Until the day that I had clarity with my relationship. It took me sometime before I was able to figure it out.


I stepped back a little bit to see the whole picture. Seeing things from a distant will make you realized your actual stand; it will help you think what's best for you and your partner. As the questions and doubts fade away. Letting go is easier. You will understand where he/she is coming from and what's really going on to both of you. Your heart will start to process the truth that you already knew long time ago and as result; a decision with clarity will be served.

Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable, think about such things. - Philippians 4:8

Choosing love may sometimes mean you have to move on without that person you used to cherish.

Keep this in mind: Life is a choice. Whatever has to be done, it is always your choice.
CHOOSE LOVE.

2014: DO NOT DESPISE SMALL BEGINNINGS

I can still remember last year’s phrase “Do not despise small beginnings.” Indeed 2014 was a wonderful year. I am grateful to Him who paid the price that I could not pay, the perfect love that cast out my fears.

Here are some of the things that I am thankful for this year:

1. Having a bicycle that takes me to nice places while pumping my heart out. It’s a fun adventure, healthy and wanderlust satisfying.


2. Restoration of my relationship with God.


3. The bondage that’s strangles me spiritually for the longest time was finally loose.


4. Enjoying my Victory Group. God is using them to teach me a lot of things.


5. Being able to attend Victory Weekend and got baptized. A deeper understanding of His love and grace that is available for all.


6. A broken heart. God is making a better version of me and is preparing me to be the right person for someone.


7. Started a business as PRULIFE UK financial consultant.


8. Learning to smile and communicate better with people.


9. Got promoted.


10. A fun and life changing outreach in Boys’ town.


11. My sister entered a married life.



There are a lot of things that I am thankful and these are just the highlights of my year, something that will remind me of the blessings that our faithful God gave me.

BIRTHDAY FOODTRIP SA LILAC ST. MARIKINA

Bilang mahilig akong kumain. Bilang kaarawan ko at ng dalawa ko pang kaibigan na si Kevin at Gelo, Bilang bumisita dito sa Maynila ang kapatid ng super friend kong si Nissa na si Eric, naisipan kong yayain sila na mag foodtrip sa Marikina. Nag simula agad kaming mag research at mag plano. Akala ko hindi ulit matutuloy kasi medyo mahilig kami mag drawing  tipong taking Master's in Fine Arts haha! buti na lang naging mabait at masipag kaming lahat isang Sabado.. :)


Sabado ang napagkasunduan namin na araw at eto ang mga naplanong puntahan; PANDE AMERIKANA, FORGET ME NOT, COOKIE MUG AT CAFE LIDIA.  Apat na kainan sa loob lamang ng anim na oras. imagine. haha!

First stop: FORGET ME NOT

Cozy place, very vibrant aura, modern, malamig, nakaka-feel at home tsaka merong malakas na wifi. Iba-iba ang inorder namin para matikman as much as we can, ang nakakatawa lang eh walang nagawang tikiman kasi hindi namin namalayan ubos na pala yung nasa kanya-kanya naming plato, lalo yung kay Kevin (bully mode on :p )... pasta lang kasi..hehe. Satisfied kami sa lasa kagaya ng place, it taste cozy as well. They offer buffet set-up whenever nag po-promo sila.. May mga available na parking space para sa mga tsikot. It's a place for couple's date, barkada trip at family bonding. Budget: Php180. Next stop.

Buffalo Wings.

4 THINGS TO AVOID REGRET

This blog was written with one thing in mind; that other people might learn from these things and avoid doing the same.






1. Do not hurry getting a job just to please people or just to say that you are not job less after graduating. THINK CAREFULLY. Your first job most likely dictate the future of your career. It will affect your career growth, your growth as a person, your intellect, your financial freedom and your self-esteem. In most cases, career shifting is very tedious.

2. Do not fall in love with someone who is already in love with someone else. It is like banging your self on a wall. It will drain all your energy and happiness. It will change you as a person; bitter or better, your choice.

3. Do not force yourself to be in sync with your friends/colleagues lifestyle if your income cannot sustain it yet. This will only leave you broke and struggling with your finances.

4. Do not force yourself to maturity because time and circumstances will bring you there whether you like it or not. If given the chance, maximize your youth but NOT in expense of your health... :). Enjoy as much as you can. Because when quarter life crisis sink-in to your soul that's the time you will search for deeper meaning about everything.

It is true that regrets are inevitable but what important is that we enjoy the experience we had and learned from it.


Word of God that we can fonder in times of regret:


"...I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead" - Phil 3:13

WHY ARE YOU SO AFRAID?

This entry has been inspired by what I've heard in the teaching series: "When Question Are Answers."-- Why Are You So Afraid?. The word was so timely that it gives light to my current struggle. I have been in fear about so many things in life lately; career, plans, finances and relationships.






At the beginning of mankind, We are in perfect harmony with God. We do not know fear. We are in full confidence of our existence until sin came into picture. We got separated from God's holiness so fear started to cultivate in our hearts.

The Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?” .

He answered, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.” - Genesis 3:9-10

When Jesus came, He thought us to fear no more. I went to church with my heart so preoccupied with so much thoughts of compromise. Thoughts of the things that I am willing to adjust and share for someone I really love. There I realized the reason why I am so fearful is because my heart was already quite in distance with the love of Christ. I'm trying to figure things out on my own way again. Trust and confidence lost its compass. Therefore, I need to go back to Him in prayer, in worship and in reading His word.

There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. 

For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love. -1 John 4:18

Whenever God asked questions in the bible, He is actually revealing Himself through it -- by His questions He stirs up our hearts.


God is love and love never fails.